Context Is Key: 4 Things To Consider When (Accidentally) Sexualizing Keith Lee

TikTok sensation Keith Lee recently went viral again, but this time, it was not his scathing review of Atlanta restaurants that caused uproar. Instead, it was Lee’s vulnerable 360 fitness picture that caught negative attention. While flexing his back, Lee may have innocently meant for his traps and lats to be the most celebrated, but his glutes became the notable quality. Many Black gay men explicitly expressed disdain and disappointment at him for “ sexualizing fitness content,” and others believed that “ this type of thirst trap had to be on purpose.”

Lee clapped back, expressing frustration at the unwanted sexual comments, and reminded his millions of followers that he is “a happily married man. A straight man with kids. A wife.” This did not stop hundreds of Black gay men from critiquing Lee; some even called his acts homophobic and vowed to stop following him.

As a Black queer man, I understand the immediate inclination and instinct to interpret Lee’s post in a certain way. Still, I also find it critical to hold the community accountable and hope we consider four key facts.

1. Lee cannot control his shape, and Black bodies should not be policed. This includes straight Black men.

   For centuries, Black bodies have been gawked at and ridiculed. Black women are often objectified and sexualized because of their curves, while Black men usually receive stereotypes related to penis size. In this instance, Lee’s natural body is sexualized and fantasized in a way that follows a dangerous and toxic trend. His post was public, and therefore, people assumed his body was on display and available to critique.

2. Attraction to straight men may be normal, but unwarranted harassment is not.

   In this situation, I do not believe it is fair to ask Black queer men not to be attracted to Lee. That seems counterproductive. However, I do think it is fair to ask Black queer men to accept sexual boundaries and place parameters on how that attraction is expressed. The attraction to Lee is not the problem; the harassment is. If Black straight men repeatedly made comments about turning a queer man straight, we would rightfully be in uproar.

3. This creates an incredibly toxic and harmful choice for Black straight men.

   If we want a world where all Black men are carefree, we must be adamant about creating the conditions in which that can happen. Lee is straight and has been clear about that. Public figures like Keith Lee, who embrace playfulness and silliness, usher in a carefree, nuanced perspective of Black masculinity. However, the constant critiques prevent more progress from being made. In fact, in his response video, Lee explicitly said, “ he does not post certain things” because he is afraid of the backlash and negative feedback.

4. Lee has the right to draw boundaries and advocate for himself.

   If we’re serious about building authentic queer-straight alliances, we, as queer people, must also respect boundaries. Just as we reject having our identities policed, we shouldn’t impose labels or assumptions on others. Respect is mutual.

   When a straight man rejects an unwanted advance from a gay man, he’s often labeled as homophobic. I agree that the tone, language, and framing could be homophobic, but straight men have the right to communicate those boundaries.

As a Black gay man, I know what it feels like to be misread and denied the ability to be carefree. I also know what it is like to have unreciprocated attractions. Keith Lee is not the enemy, and while it is acceptable to have critiques, it is not acceptable to rationalize harassment.

(Cover image of Keith Lee by Kayla James - Via Lee’s Instagram)